The treat economy
Reflections from shopping jail
I texted Claire around Thanksgiving last year (read: Black Friday) that I wanted to try to go a full year without buying any new clothes, and to my surprise, she very enthusiastically signed herself up to join me. We were boycotting Black Friday for Gaza. But at the same time, I was getting very sick of my addiction to consumerism, and strike or no strike, Black Friday always shines a strobe light on how much shit we own and are hypnotized to own. I really felt like I had zero sense of agency over my purchasing, like I needed to buy things more than things needed to be bought. This was around the same time that we were talking about starting a newsletter together. So here’s us doing both.
The rules are really simple. We’re not buying new clothes, and if we do, we have to report it in our monthly reflections, say 10 hail marys, and try better next time. It’s a pretty simple, very Catholic way of dealing with things, I know. I think the point of listing things that we buy is just a way to make us pause and think about what’s worth it. Intentionality rather than shame and punishment. TBH, I don’t really mind confessing to my small audience of Friends when I fail at an extremely ambitious and optimistic standard that no one has asked me to pursue. What I do mind is half-assing a project that I want to accomplish. In short, the confessions aren’t about y’all as much as they’re about us. (Maybe I’m lying about the last part. Only time will tell.)
I know we’re all very sick of having and hearing yet another conversation about consumerism. I’m sorry for forcing another one. It’s not that I think I know everything about overconsumption and that I believe I’m, like, enlightened or whatever for trying something ambitious. In actuality, I’m treating this like an experiment and a learning opportunity. I want to really face myself and interrogate the mindset I inhabit when I start browsing. I think I will learn a lot about myself. I’ve already realized that sometimes when I’m caught up in a prolonged state of ennui, I will subconsciously hunt for something to feel desire for just so that I can feel anything at all.
A lot of people have been asking me, “not even vintage?” and the reason for that is that secondhand shopping, especially the way our culture does it, with hauls of dozens of items, is still hyperconsumerist, and ultimately that’s the tendency I’m working against in myself. Obviously vintage is better, and if I do buy something, which I’m sure at some point I will, that’s what I will aim for.
The thing is that I love style, and I love my style. At 28 years old, I have years worth of clothes that I purchased very enthusiastically and lovingly. Clothes that I really love and care about and wore while I was becoming who I am. I hope to get back in touch with those items and memories and still be really into my wardrobe. This, I believe, will be the least challenging and most fulfilling part of this all.
I also want to say that this is, for me, an extension of every economic strike that we perform in the name of Palestinian liberation. Our biggest collective action of influence in the heart of the global empire is an economic one. In this particular liberation movement, it seems we can only do one trick and that’s deprive and withhold our money.
Your friend,
Aamina
Aamina’s notes from January:
I wore an amazing outfit on NYE with stuff I already owned. Got so many compliments. Forgot to take pictures, you’ll just have to believe me.
I went to the Artists for Gaza and Sudan show in Newark on the 4th, and they had merch, and I realized that I can’t buy merch. One of my friends was like, “well it’s for charity.” And I was like, “true, but I could just donate that to Gaza mutual aid without buying something.” My friends were very proud of my resolve, lmao! I was too. But it was a lot easier to feel energized in my convictions four days in. I’m at 22 days as I’m typing this, and I am feeling the burn.
I found a vintage necklace pendant that I want so badly. I don’t feel resolved. I still want it. Nothing else to say about that.
I’ve been using Pinterest a lot because there is a ton of aesthetic inspiration that doesn’t really encourage shopping as much as it encourages creative application.
I found a hole forming in the crotch of one of my favorite pairs of pants, and it is seriously weighing on my heart. But I will probably replace them with something.
It’s so cold that I’m struggling to care what I look and am prioritizing warmth and probably would be even if I could buy new stuff. So these will probably change as the weather warms up.
Yes I know that it’s probably not possible that I’ll go a whole year not acquiring a single new clothing or accessory item. The point is to try.
Honestly, it wasn’t a big fashion month bc I was freezing and miss mood got my ass. Next edition will include actual outfits.
Claire’s notes from January:
Aamina told me they’re curious about what non-clothing items we’ll buy instead. I’ve been thinking about that a lot, and where that shows up for me are household items: candles, sheets, silk pillowcases… I’m resisting, and doing more laundry to give myself freshness and good smells lol
I’m trying to make myself look at my items more, to remind myself I have things I’ve never even worn. Badge of honor when my roommate asks, “Where have you been hiding that all your life??”
A month in to this challenge, I’m thinking about body stuff, and how at different times in my life new clothing has been either a way to love my body more or a way to bandaid over my insecurities so I don’t have to feel them. Ideally, I want clothes to be joyous, or at least neutral — not intrinsically tied to my emotions
I told Aamina this as a joke but it feels true: when I’m bored and want to buy things I just play Sims and make my little Sims rich and successful and addicted to buying shit instead… it’s exorcising